i sometimes think about parallel universe, alternative future, where we live happily.

i really wish the best for that "me".
why am i still alive.

I don't really talk much with her IRL, even having meal with her.
She seems so upset about it.
it seems that i … don't understand her very well.

i hate myself.

i must restrain myself to text her for 24 hrs.

i texted her with a very obvious signal.
She evaded it.

Maybe she is just not like me.
Why can't i just give up.

sometimes i just think that
i am just out of my depth.

From this point onward, for statistics purpose,
all posts related to her will be classified into one of the two hashtags, according to the mood:

Ahhhhh I love her so much
I want to see her everyday.
To be with her. ahhhhh

i always wish that i never exist.

If it wasn't that shock i had, i never realized how fragile life is.

Her name was my first thought, right after i had regained conscious.

I realized that I love her _de facto_.

The good old depression is coming back for me.

This time, i have medicine.
and time, many time for me to cry.

If it wasn't she, i will never go out.

Regardless of my present, she will go out, as independent as she will be.

And I am still a trash.

Imagine: In another parallel universe,
we never met.

And things don't change for her.
And i don't feel pain…THAT MUCH pain.

My entire life is prepared for her.
She seems so perfect…too perfect…

I don't deserve her.
She don't need me.

Why can't i be happy.
What have i done to deserve this pain.


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